The Baby Shower is Here

Wow. This Sunday is MY baby shower! Mine. There were so many days I never thought I'd have a baby shower.

My friend from AZ flew in yesterday for it and surprised me - I thought my husband was working late, but he drove to Boston to pick her up. And her 8 month old, who is soooo cute. I think I'm still in shock!! I'm so excited, I can barley wait until Sunday. I have to work tomorrow and focusing on work is going to be difficult but it'll pass the day and then I get to go to my own baby shower.

It's so exciting. Tonight we're going through my baby stuff to sort it out. WOW.

I'm on cloud nine!

4 Pounds, 2 Ounces

We had our appts today! They went really well - I am VERY happy. I've been worried about the whole 10-movements-in-an-hour thing so I was anxious to ask. Everything went great. My blood pressure is fine (108/65!) and much, much lower than last appt. I've gained another 5 pounds, so that makes 21 total, which is well within normal. My belly is 32 cm and that's also perfect for the almost 32 weeks I am. Whew! The heartbeat was nice and strong...162 bpm.

I asked about the movement. I have to say, Dr. H is not my most favorite doctor! I'm going to see if I can change my appts to a different doctor if possible. It's the way he words things. I told him about our instructor saying 10 movements an hour and he said, "Oh you mean 10 movements in 2 hours". NO. I meant an hour, that's what she said. He said no, not an hour - two hours and a movement can be anything - a twinge, a flutter, whatever. So I tell him that I'm not having tons of kicks and they're sporadic and he interrupts again and says, "Well what do you mean by sporadic?" I've been telling him this for WEEKS now. AAAHHH!! He said that it's normal since the baby sleeps, then moves around, the sleeps more...and if I don't feel movement when I usually do then I should call. I'm not really feeling more reassured about that whole conversation but I'm taking it as if I'm not sure, I'll call. Check.

So my appts are every two weeks now, for 3 appointments and then I'll go every week. In 4 weeks at my 36 week appt, we'll have one more ultrasound and an internal check and also the Strep B test. As Dr H. says, "We'll take a swab culture from your vagina." GEE, thanks - I didn't think it would be from my throat or anything! ha!

And the baby is SO big! 4 pounds, 2 ounces. She's in the 57th percentile for her gestational age, which is exactly where we want her to be. Everything's growing as it should and she's so cute. I can't wait to hold her! Dr. High Risk is very pleased and he's my favorite doctor, ever.

Onto Infant CPR class tonight...

The Baby Class from Hell

So last night was birthing class #1. I went into it kind of excited - definitely happy to be taking the class and looking forward to learning more about the birth process.

Boy was I wrong.

The first part of the class is pretty standard - what to expect from the classes, what we'd cover, ect. A half hour into it, she starts talking about signs that something is wrong. Ok, that was fine. We talk about all the things that you should call your doctor about - pretty standard stuff.

Then she gets into the section about preterm labor. I had a total and complete panic attack.

She starts explaining about fetal moving and how we should do kick counts and feel 10 kicks or movements or some kind of something in a hour. AN HOUR!? Sometimes if I get 10 kicks a day I'm lucky. I think that was when my husband sensed my freak out happening. I tried to calm down though and I'm going to talk to my doctor about it tomorrow at my appointment.

Then she talks about contractions and what they are and all that. She explains that if we go to L&D to have our baby monitored (other than when we're in labor) they'll do a non-stress test. I didn't know it, but that's what they did to me when I went into premature labor with my last pregnancy. So she's explaining the monitors and the paper that comes out of the machine and how it measures the baby's heartbeat and they give you a button to press when you have a contraction....all stuff I already had lived thorough.

I had no idea talking about it would bother me so much! I turned beet red and I got really hot and then my eyes welled up with tears. It was awful. Dh kept asking me if I was okay and if it was because of the 10-kicks-an-hour thing. I couldn't even talk to him and I was afraid everyone in the room would see I was upset. It was terrible.

Then another lady in the class starts talking about how she had already been to the hospital twice for the non-stress test and how it was fine each time. She also said she had cramping and back pain and blah blah blah...I wanted to scream for her to shut-up, we didn't want to hear how everything was fine after that. I seriously felt crazy for a few minutes!

Thankfully, the instructor moved on pretty quickly (onto the water breaking - another thing I had lived through - UGH) but I managed to tune her out and pull myself together. Between my hormones, which I swear I can literally FEEL going crazy, being overtired and the reaction I had to the preterm labor stuff, I was done. The rest of the class wasn't too bad - except another lady kept asking about horror-show type labor stories...I'll spare you the details but it was pretty dramatic and I found a little funny because she thought some crazy things would happen to her.

The last part of class was the baby being born movie. Oh boy. It was pretty graphic, which I had expected but of course I was in tears again. Not surprisingly, since I teared up at the breastfeeding video and at commercials - especially those involving puppies or babies. Aaaah! I'm going to ask if this is normal but everyone seems to think it is.

The movie scared the hell out of me.

Dh and I went to dinner after class - he could tell I was pretty upset and emotionally exhausted. Right after we ordered, I totally lost it and broken down. I told him I didn't know if I could do the whole labor part of this (not that I have an option!) and that until the movie, I was really confident I could but the movie kind of scared me. I am completely freaked out. That paired with my previous panic attack and I had a meltdown right in the restaurant.

He was really good to me and reassured me that I - and we - can do this. He reminds me that I'm not alone, which is really great to hear. I feel better today but I'm still feeling a little worn out after the class.

I'm hoping next week's birthing class goes much better.

So Close

This is a big week for my pregnancy - and I really feel like I'm SO close to having this baby. Like everything's really happening! We finished cleaning out the nursery and this week we're moving the office into the basement. Friday we're picking up the baby furniture. Tuesday the painter is coming. And sometime in the next few weeks, I suspect, is my baby shower.

Holy crap.

I keep telling my husband I feel like everything's in transition. Which, I know it is, but it's so weird to finally be here. It's somewhere I wasn't sure I'd ever be! I'm enjoying every second and I'm starting to get so excited, I just can't wait.

Tomorrow night we have our first of four birthing classes. I'm looking forward to it, actually. Everyone tells me that you pretty much throw all the prep classes out the window when labor is actually here, but that's okay. I'm just happy it's my turn to be going.

Happy 31.2 weeks to me.

Breastfeeding 101

Last night was our breastfeeding class. I have to say that I went into with a very open mind. Honestly, I expected it to be very hard core with the breastfeeding - like really pushing the issue on us. But, I am happy to say that it was SO wonderful and the class was even better than I could have ever expected.

Our instructor, B, was SO nice. She gave us lots of information on the whole thing and answered the top 10 most common questions. Then we got to ask our own questions, which was awesome. Most of the moms-to-be were interested in pumping, so there was a whole section on that. She went over what to expect while we're in the hosptial after we have the baby and how the Lactiation Center works, ect.

The whole thing seemed very overwhelming to me but now I feel much more at ease. Just arming myself with the information made me feel much better. I'm going to give a try and see what happens - having a plan makes things easier for me so I feel some relief.

I also have to say that dh is the best! He went with me, which only 2 other dads were there. I think it's important because even though I'm doing the breastfeeding, I'm going to need his help and support. And he understands that. Besides, it was fun to joke around with him after about the ET like baby doll and the stuffed boobie they used in class.

Only 5 more days until our next appt and ultrasound!
31 Weeks tomorrow.

Rounding Third

I am 30 weeks pregnant today. Holy crap!

Overall I think I'm doing pretty well. This past week, however, has been the first where I'm starting to feel uncomfortable. My hips are hurting all of the time, especially when I sleep. I have every Boppy pregnancy shaped pillow invented and I've tried regular and body pillows too. I'm wondering if the baby is somehow more on my hips than before - even when I'm sitting, I feel like my hip bones are expanding every day. It's a weird feeling.

Otherwise, I really can't complain. The only feelings I have that I can't kick are that something will happen to the baby inside of me and I won't know. She's not very active to start with and it's very come-and-go (although I do feel movement at least a few times a day - even just a kick here and there). I have my heartbeat monitor I like to use too. I always get the thump-thump on it. Whew. But my anxiety gets the best of me sometimes. I think it's because I'm SO close. Even my preterm labor fears aren't as strong as the non-moving-baby ones...I try to rationalize with myself and sometimes I just can't. So I try to take it as I go and I try to remind myself that the feeling of anxiety will usually pass.

I've been having a few more Braxton Hicks here and there. I noticed they did slow down over the past 4 weeks or so but I had two today! My stomach contorts into these really weird shapes when they happen. It's kind funny. I also notice that when I touch my stomach, especially with the heartbeat monitor thing, I give them to myself. I try not to do that.

Speaking of stomach, I feel huge! I've gained 16 pounds (well, as of 2 weeks ago!) but my large and extra-large maternity shirts are starting to be a little small! I don't mind one bit though, I just think it's rather amusing.

This week we kick it into high gear with getting-ready-for -baby. Thursday night, breastfeeding class. The following Tuesday night, birthing class #1. Follow Thursday, Infant CPR. Then three more Tuesdays of birthing classes. And Meet the Pediatrician Night on 3/11. AND, doctor's appointment and ultrasound on February 16th. Appts every 2 weeks after, with one more ultrasound in my 36th week!! Woo hoo.

My baby shower, I suspect, is in three or four weeks! I cannot believe it. I am SO excited about it. I just want it to happen and I want to share the day with everyone who is there...all that good stuff. I can't believe I only have 10 more weeks left (or so!) of this pregnancy. 7 weeks until full term.

I better get working on the nursery!

Finally I Passed!

I passed the 3 hour glucose test. Thank goodness! Everything came back "normal" so I am very happy about that.

Yesterday I bought my baby shower outfit. The clothes I will wear to MY own baby shower. Wow!! I still don't know when it is, but it's got to be in the next 4 weeks or so. I genuinely don't enjoy being surprised with this kind of thing - I'm way too much of a control freak for that - but I'm trying to enjoy it. My sister is so excited and she's doing a good job of keeping everyone's lips shut. Nobody has even mentioned it to me.

My February 13th deadline of having our office empty is coming fast. The progress on cleaning out of the office is not. UGH. Worst case, I delay the furniture pick up and have the office painted after the dressers are in it, but that's not what my original plan was. SEE - control freak!

Yesterday and Monday were baby's 'slow' days. I literally get 2 or 3 kicks a day. Today she's been pretty busy and I love it. Whew. I worry so much that something will happen and I won't know. And when I'm not worrying about that, I'm afraid my water will suddenly break or I will go into instant labor. SIGH. I hate these fears. I try to tell myself that everything is fine and most likely those things will not happen but I can't help it.

Only 10 more weeks (and 2 days).